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| don't talk to me if you look like this |
Picture this. You are on the website Archive of Our Own, and you have just finished the most gorgeous fanfiction you have ever read. The characterization is on point, the author has an incredible way with words, maybe there's some good smut, whatever works for you. The Perfect Fanfiction. Eager, you go to the author's profile on AO3. Maybe they've written more stories for this fandom. Maybe they've even written for other fandoms you like! You can't wait.
Good news: the author is prolific. They've written so much. Bad news: besides the one you've just read... it's all hockey. Every. Single. Fanfic. Is hockey RPF.
This has happened to me more than twice and it's why I hate hockey.
Don't get me wrong. Live your truth, write whatever you want. It's my fault for getting my hopes up. But damn it, it hits like a brick to the face. It's all hockey RPF, and it's usually about some dude named Jonathan. I don't know, I don't read it. Because I hate hockey now. I don't want to watch the gay hockey show for multiple reasons, but this is a big one. I don't want to see gay hockey players. I know about gay hockey players. I wish I didn't.
Note: this hatred does not include that Check Please! web comic. I never read it, but I have friends who did, and it seems fun. The hockey boy who makes pies is exempt.
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